Life Sucks Part 2: All Is Right With the World

I still hold strong to my last post about how life sucks.  There’s no denying that, at least in part, without being delusional.  Yet this morning, I find myself waking up with a sense of overwhelming peace.  I am satisfied with the day thus far and with my life.  

It’s not like I’m doing anything exciting, I’m just going through my usual Saturday routine.  The kids let me sleep in until a whopping 6:30 (hallelujah!) before waking me up to have me feed them, then I slept for another few hours.  I read a few pages in bed after I decided it was time to get up and I’d had enough sleep (my favorite thing about Saturdays, they’re the one day I can sleep as long as I want).  

A few minutes later I got up out of bed and sorted the laundry and put some in the washing machine.  As I did, I remembered a few things that I need to pick up at the store later today.  Usually at this point I start to prepare myself for action, pumping myself up to go to the store and to figure out some sort of recipe to make tonight for dinner that will give us leftovers for tomorrow.  Instead, this morning I found myself just being thankful that I could even go grocery shopping, and that I’m adult enough to make a list (silly, silly things).

My mind hummed with my schedule today: do laundry, go grocery shopping, finish my homework, work out.  I rarely make lists for myself, but when I do they sort of swallow me up because I have pressure to get everything done.  Not today.

Today, as I moved around our apartment, I felt satisfied.  I cleaned the house yesterday, so that was one less thing to do.  Aquinas and Ashi were both passed out on the bed with Aaron, so I didn’t have to ref any fights.  I didn’t feel self conscious that my hair was sticking straight up.  I was grateful (and still am) for how a lot of really crappy situations lately have turned out.  I was even more grateful for the ability to be grateful.  I woke up with the smile on my lips that I’d gotten so used to through most of my life, but that had seemed to abandon me for the past couple of years.

Nothing in this world is perfect.  We don’t know why things happen and we have to try to be content with knowing that God may or may not let us know, yet He still uses things for good.  As you know, I am fully aware of all of this.  Yet, instead of thinking of Job and Joseph, other verses are flowing through my head.  

“This is the day the Lord had made, I will rejoice and be glad in it” (Psalm 118:24).  I think that a lot of people take this verse to mean that they have to be happy about everything no matter how hard and how crushing it might be, that it’s an ultimatum.  But what we are called to do here is rejoice in everything that God does.  He doesn’t create the bad situations, although He’ll allow them.  God makes good out of the bad situations.  I say, rejoice in that.  God has made this day as He’s made all things and He is good, so we will rejoice in the fact that He brings good into this fallen world and that He cares enough to do so.

For over ten years, what I considered my life verse was Matthew 6:34, 35, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself; each day has enough troubles of its own.”  I’ve been a worrier my whole life and this verse is a reminder to take each day and it’s troubles one by one.  For someone who is afraid that not worrying means that they aren’t prepared for situations in life, you can’t get any better an excuse to relax than that.  

So far today, I’m impressed upon to feel few troubles and just kick back, enjoying my day that will be filled with the boring and the usual.  Heck, I’m barely even annoyed that, yet again, what I’ve written isn’t quite as good as what I’d been thinking in my head before sitting down to my computer. I’m just happy that I can write something with good enough grammar for people to be able to read.  Just call me Pollyanna.